My Immortal
by clato4thewin
Summary: Alexbelle songfic to the song My Immortal, I don't own anything.


**A/N One shot to the song My Immortal, Written for clatoeverdeen13's contest. Enjoy! **

_Xander's P.O.V._

**I'm so tired of being here,**

I'm in the hospital's waiting room, the love of my life, Isabelle Fuhrman, has been in a car accident, and was immediately rushed to the emergency room. The doctors won't let me in to see her; they're shouting things at eachother, trying so desperately to keep my wife alive. We're been happily married for a year and a half now, our wedding was on her 22nd birthday.

**Suppressed by all my childish fears**

Ever since I was little, I've been so afraid of hospitals. I didn't have many fears, but that was one of them, it was stupid, I know.

**And if you have to leave, I wish that you would just leave**

3 years. _It's been three years since you left me, to go live in the beyond. I just hope that you're happy where you are, but I miss you like crazy. _I decide to go through the box I've refused to go near for so long, it's been sitting there, filled with cherished memories that have given me so many nightmares.

**Your presence still lingers here, and it won't leave me alone**

_I can tell you're here. Observing every careful move I make as I uncase the old photos and objects that have been collecting dust for so long. I feel somewhat safer, comforted by this. I don't want you to leave me. I never did. _

**These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real**

I thought that doing this would be easier. After so many years of grieving, that I'd be strong enough to not cry. But I was wrong. This pain is so intense. It hurts even more.

**There's just too much that time cannot erase**

Over time, things don't get easier, time doesn't make the pain just disappear, it's still always there. This isn't just some scraped knee that can go away after a week. It's real.

**When you cried, I wiped away all of your tears**

_I remember the day I walked into our bedroom, to find you sitting on the bed, crying. "Belles? What happened baby?" I ask, coming to sit next to you, wrapping my arms around you. "Do you still love me?" Is all you say. "You are my everything- How can I not love you?" I reply, wiping the tears that are streaming down your pale face. I hug you, while you continue to cry, for reasons I don't know. I don't know what I did to you._

**When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears**

_You woke up screaming that one night; the nightmares would do that to you. "Shh, Belles, I'm here, you're okay." I reassured you, cradling you in my arms._

**And I held your hand through all of these years**

_When we would sleep, I would intertwine your hand in mine, every night. _

**But you still have all of me**

_Whenever we would go out, you would almost always pick the place, like you were in control. Wherever you wanted to go, whatever you wanted to do. It's like you owned me, I was yours. _

**You used to captivate me, by your resonating light**

_The light your eyes would reflect, would remind me. Remind me that we are eachothers, no one else's. We were captivated by each other. _

**Now I'm bound by the life you left behind**

_I could never find another girl, it wouldn't feel right. Only you. _

**Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams**

_I wake up in the middle of the night, so often now, by the nightmares of the car wreck. My dreams used to be about us living happily ever after. Used to._

**My voice it, chased away all the sanity in me**

I cry out in frustration, punching the wall. This isn't real. I'm crazy, I've gone crazy. All of this is just pretend.

**These wounds won't seem to heal**

3 years and 6 months. Nothings easier, if anything, it's gotten harder.

**This pain is just too real**

Why is there pain, suffering like this in the world?

**There's just too much that time cannot erase**

53 years. It's been 53 years now, and the hurting continued, it never stopped. Over all of these years, Jack, Jackie, Mark, Josh, and more, have all visited, telling me the same thing, over and over. It's alright, everything's okay, it will get easier. But those are all lies.

**I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone**

_But I could never bring myself to say that you're gone. I never will. But though you're still with me, I can tell I won't last much longer. I've gotten sicker and sicker, and I feel weak. All of me is weak._

_I pass in my sleep, If only you could have been so lucky. I find myself in a meadow. I look around, taking in my surroundings. Then I see you. Running towards me, I scoop you up in my arms. "Do you still love me?" You ask. "You're my everything- How can I not love you?" I reply smiling. We kiss, nothing's changed, your eyes still have their sparkle, your lips still have their perfect shape and their warmth. They fit against mine perfectly. "I've been with you the whole time." You say. _

**I've been alone all along**

**A/N How was that? I hope you liked it; again this is for clatoeverdeen13's contest. **


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